What Haley does when left alone with my video camera.
Haley’s Grandmother’s horse Scout by me
Last time I was in Athens Haley and I decided to take a walk along the train tracks behind her house and found this awesome rope swing next to a beautiful hidden ravine. Even though she couldn’t push me hard enough to get over the ravine, it was still really fun to swing. Something I almost never do anymore. :)
Living in Hawaii must suck.
Roadtrip?
Haley will be here for her spring break and we’re itching to go somewhere.
Options so far: Chicago and Austin. I’ve been to Chicago a dozen times and we’d like to go somewhere new, but not too far away.
Anyone know of anything cool within 8-10 hours or so of Kansas City?
Feckin hate these dolls somebody put up in Target ON THE AISLE
Counseling is Weird.
Especially when your clients are right around your age.
I counsel at a tiny college. As in, I didn’t even know there were colleges this small: 850 students total. The counseling center is the clinical psychologist on staff (my supervisor), me, and one other practicum student who is there on different days than I.
This means that everybody knows everyone else—it’s like one big family—and therefore everything about everyone else. There have been a few times when students have asked me about other students they know I’m seeing. I can’t tell them anything, so I just shrug. That came automatically, and it was one of the things that made me realize that I have some competency. But I can’t help but wonder—what do they say about me?
Right now I have more clients than anyone else, and most of them are regular—I’ve been meeting with them once (in some cases twice) a week for the past few months. I’ve come to know them better on a certain level than most of the people in their lives.
One girl had been carrying around a huge trauma on her shoulders for over a year until she finally decided to tell someone—me.
She got rid of some of the weight, and gave it to me. My professor’s always talked about how this medicine man she knew would tell her to unload all of her clients’ troubles onto Mother Earth, because she’s the only thing that’s strong enough to take all of it. I hear that.
But it’s not as bad as I had thought it might be. People tell me things that make me completely depressed about how terrible humans can be, things that make me rage inside. But I’m usually able to leave it at the office. Or at least the drive home. I don’t know how I do it, but if I didn’t compartmentalize it all, I don’t know how I could live my life.
Maybe I’m able to do it because it’s not all bad. Following my panic disorder, having to sit in a room with individuals for several hours a day while remaining absolutely composed seemed like the most difficult thing I could ever possibly do.
But it hasn’t been like that. The new clients usually have so many interesting things to say that my self is far out of focus. And the regular clients, well, those are the “weird” ones, I guess. Because I know all about them. All about their relationships, their fears, goals, patterns, and behaviors.
And they know almost nothing about me.
But that is exactly how it’s supposed to be. If they knew all about me, they would become concerned about me and their focus wouldn’t be on themselves, where it needs to be for therapeutic gains.
But there’s a paradox: the number one predictor of successful treatment outcomes is the therapeutic relationship. The bond between therapist and client. How does this happen if they don’t know anything about me personally?
It’s strange, but I think it’s all about trust. They develop trust that I’ll always be there to listen, to be nonjudgmental and unbiased, and to help them with whatever they’re going through.
One of my first clients completely stonewalled me in our first session. “So, what brings you in today?” glare. “…would you say you’ve been feeling sad lately?” glare. …and now she couldn’t be happier to come in; keeps all her appointments, is extremely apologetic if she has to be even 5 minutes late, says thank you and smiles at the end of every session. She has almost no friends, and so I’ve become someone she can talk to, who isn’t going to get mad at her and stop talking to her because she does things differently.
I got an email from one of my other clients last week. She was really struggling when she came in, and I helped her see things differently. She thanked and thanked me for helping her, saying how much she appreciates everything I’ve done for her this semester.
And I like these people. Talking with them is nice. Seeing them improve is one of the most fulfilling things I’ve felt. But tomorrow and Thursday are our last sessions of the semester, and then what? I’d like to see them again, but at the same time I’d like to see them feel like they don’t need counseling anymore.
People come and go in your life, I guess. I just hope I can do some good while I’m in theirs.
I’m sure one or two of them completely hated me, haha. What can you do.
Three and a half miles north of Ground Zero, the most iconic skyscraper in the world stands unscathed in midtown. Not long after this photograph was made, the towers were gone — and the Empire State Building was again, for the first time in a quarter century, the tallest building in New York City. Perhaps alone of all the images in this gallery, Marty Lederhandler’s photograph somehow evokes a peaceful and, incredibly, a hopeful response. Yes, the towers are in flames. Yes, the attacks have changed everything in ways that remain, even today, unforeseeable. And yet, here we see vast tracts of a great city unscathed, iconic structures untouched. There’s a sense here, if one looks for it, that a nation, unprepared, has taken an awful blow, and has staggered — but still stands.
(via 9/11: The 25 Most Powerful Photos by LIFE)
I was a junior in high school, sitting in AP U.S. History when the second plane hit. It was a beautiful morning, sun trickling in from the trees outside the window, dew still on the grass. We heard about the first plane hitting during my previous class, Modern World History, and all of us were asking each other if we knew anyone in New York, and speculating about how many people worked in the towers—2,000? 20,000?. The world history teacher came in with an urgency in her voice that I’ve never heard from a teacher before, saying a second plane hit.
All of us crowded into the computer lab and watched the televisions that were replaying what had just happened. Then we saw them collapse. An entire country changed forever in an instant.
I feel fortunate that I was old enough to understand what was going on, after hearing about college kids today that were in elementary school when it happened. Here we were in APUSH, learning about America’s unwavering imperialism and thinking we were the most invincible country that ever existed.
I was in a daze the rest of the day. I dropped a friend off after school and then just drove around for a few hours, listening to the news. And the amazing thing is that, in a way, it was like this for everyone across the country that was fortunate enough not to have anyone hurt in the attacks. Coming together like that is such a rare thing, and it’s sad it only occurs in the face of tragedy. But it reminded me and everyone else of our common humanity, if only for an instant. This is why I can’t hate Bush, because he did the best he could. And that’s what all of us have been doing since, isn’t it?
My nephew doing some flirting with his lady friend. Sigh, he reminds me so much of me at that age.
I almost just cried because I miss snowboarding so much. I haven’t been in years; I just have to go this winter. This may be where I will go, I love the setup of the mountain. A chair to the summit!? Yes pls.
Remember that time my boyfriend’s stepfather thought I created this video and gave me some very nice compliments about it on Facebook? And I didn’t know how to handle it so I just left it alone, just let it sit there, and now he’ll always believe I created that video?
Remember that time I didn’t have to blur out my boyfriend’s stepfather’s name in the screenshot because his Facebook name is Roxi’s Papa in honor of his pet Schnauzer?
(Previously.)
Me right before my practicum interview. I look like such a dork!
But hey, I got offered the job!
Phosphorescent - Tell Me Baby (Have You Had Enough)
The only bad grades I get are when my paper is too long or my presentation goes over the time limit.
It’s such bullshit. I’m sorry I put so much work into this. I’m so sorry if I’m using up your precious time.
If I’ve got some knowledge to lay on you, TAKE IT.
I’ve been encouraged to bring in my own music.
I will now spend all of my waking non-working hours on making a bomb ass playlist.
What is the best music to dine/drink to?
